Taking the Right Action to "Attract Back" Someone Special
Photo by Metronome0, used under a Creative Commons License.
Do you have to take action to attract someone back into your life?The short answer is yes, but not in the way you might think. For that, you have to read the very long answer.
The action that brings someone back into your life is a reflection of the action that caused them to leave. They re-enter by the same door they exited. Confused? Keep reading. (Shoot, you might as well grab a cup of tea for this one….)
One of the TV shows I loved as a kid was the original “Land of the Lost,” especially episodes written by D.C. Fontana. In one of the last shows of the original season, the family could return home if they went back through a portal and something of equal mass entered (themselves, I believe, in a time loop…but it’s been many years since I watched it). I always thought of it as a balance of energy (or matter), which is how I see this idea of “attracting back” someone you’ve lost.
I’ve often heard it said that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Sorry, but I can’t categorize that easily. Seasons constantly change but the impact is always for a lifetime. People have always come into my life for a reason, and they’ve come back for a reason, too. But can you do something—anything—to bring them back once they’ve come into your life and left, or do you just have to categorize someone as a “season” if they don’t spend consecutive years by your side?
It’s a heartfelt question from many of my readers, judging by the popularity of a handful of essays I’ve written here. Literally 5% of the essays I’ve written for this site attract 95% of its traffic. Surprised? You shouldn’t be—the heart is involved, and we all want answers that don’t come quickly. But the first question after “is it possible to attract someone back?” is usually “what do I DO to attract someone back?”
In other words, what action can you take beyond the visualizing and believing part of the Law of Attraction?
As many deep-feeling women do, I have occasionally…. This article is included in its entirety in Attract Him Back.
My ex boyfriend lost his job about one month ago. We had a long distance relationship. Everything was going well in fact so good!. We built a beautiful relationship. There was a very powerful emotional bond and a unique energy connection between us. We discovered that we were waiting all our lives to find each other. ” a dream come true”. ( heÂ´s been divorced for almost 10 years and I am single, but never had experienced something like this . heÂ´s 42 IÂ´m 34) Everything was natural, even when we disagreed in something. Recently he asked me if I wanted to marry him and of course I said yes. We were planning to get married in maybe 6 or 7 momths, and he was going to move here. Our plans and projects had started to work, regardless the not-super-good economical situation of both of us. Which was not completely bad, but not excellent either. To move to another place and start everything from scratch is not cheap…
Soon after he lost his job he started to change and to be depressed. He said that it was very diffucult for him to be ” the same” because he was worried about his loss of work and of course he needs a job and money. He was worried and felt bad cause we would not be able to do everything that we planned. He said that he needed to be kind of away. I told him that I understood and that the most important thing was that we loved each other, and that our plans could wait. HeÂ´d have to focus on the job search and I would be encouraging and supporting him in any way I could. He stopped calling me, he answered my e mails with a one-line-message, and he started to close all the communication that we had. I ocasionally sent him messages that he didnÂ´t have to answer, just telling him that all was going to be ok, and that I was here, praying for him and of course still loving him. Sometimes I just sent him letters telling him about me, my life, everything that I could tell a friend when sending an update.
10 days ago, when I called him and his mobile was not in service, I sent him a message asking if he was ok, if he had found anything, I was worried about him and the loss of communication was not doing any good to my impatient mind. I also said that I thought that we shouldnt let our love die, that we had looked for a person and a relationship like ours all our lives and it was precious. 20 minutes later, I received an e mail, saying that his mobile was cut ( he couldnt pay) and that all his life was a real mess with all the problems that a loss of job might be included. He also said ” I am sorry but there is nothing in me that wants to pursue a relationship right now” … “there is nothing in me that responds to the idea of an emotional connect. I’m sorry. Again, i know you deserve a lot better than that”…. *sigh*.
What was I to say? nothing…
I havenÂ´t stopped thinking about him one single day. And I imagine that if he has so many issues to solve, his mind and heart might not be having a very good time. That is what my logical sense tells me. And my emotional part is very sad. I feel that heÂ´s not fine and I worry about him. I miss him terribly. I havenÂ´t stopped loving him. And I havent stopped believing in a future together even if ” right now” is not possible. After reading this , I am trying to accept the fact that yes, unfortunately, there are sometimes issues or problems which donÂ´t depend on us, any of us, not him, not me and that the Universe, might be doing something now, maybe for our own good if weÂ´re going to be together again. I will leave my heart and the door open for when he decides to come back. I want to be his wife and I want him to be my husband and I donÂ´t wish this would end just like this…
I will also to follow the 6 points mentioned in the other article, to bring this relationship back to my life.I want to believe with all my heart that love doesnÂ´t die easily from one day to another and that the soul connection we have is not going to be broken. even if weÂ´re apart…
thank you for your beautiful and enlightenig thoughts.
That’s a self-worth issue, Star. He feels he has nothing to offer. YOU know better but he’s not willing to believe it yet. I’ve been meaning to write about self-value and self-love again and how we think we have to wait until everything is perfect. I will try to do that in the next few days.
IÂ´ll be paying attention tthe posts!
I recently lost contact with someone very dear to me, he was my first love who tracked me down a decade later.
We fell for each other again completley and got back together.
One day he told me I was the love of his life and he wanted to marry and have children together, we both seemed to be riding on a cloud.
Less than 48 hours later he stopped contacting me. It was heart breaking, I let him go though and since we have just exchanged a few friendly messages.
I don’t know if I should ask hm what happened, I would definitely never send a long emotional message, but I wonder if I should ask him and let him know I am not angry.
I attracted a specific person into my life and we fell in love with one another. We were engaged for nearly 3 years (long distance relationship), and for the last year we steadily grew apart. We were only talking on the phone maybe 15 min. a day and we were making less effort to see each other on the weekends. We were both falling out of love a bit, but even moreso her. She broke up with me a little over a month ago, and I’ve been miserable since. She admitted to me that she simply wasn’t in love with me anymore and attributed this to several things including: the lack of nuturing the relationship, me not putting her first in the relationship, and me not being a Christian. Her leaving me made me see how much I really love and desire her, and I don’t want to let her go. She’s already moved on and has gotten a new boyfriend already. She refuses to talk to me via e-mail, phone, etc. I even told her I’d convert to Christianity if she’d give us another chance, but she didn’t want to hear it. She wants absolutely nothing to do with me at this point, and I feel like I haven’t gotten much clarity from her. As I said, we had been growing apart for nearly a year, but I still loved her the whole time; she apparently gradually withdrew emotionally from the relationship during this period, and she now has no desire to be with me anymore. It almost feels like she hates me. I miss her so very much. I don’t want anyone other than her in my life. Is there any chance of me reattracting her?