Attracting a Relationship with a Specific Person
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Is it unethical to ask for a particular relationship with a particular person?
Some say yes, but when the heart is involved and you love the person whom you want a particular type of relationship with, you don’t want to settle for less. You may be willing to have the same kind of relationship with someone else–“or better” as the caveat often is–but you still long for a beautiful and loving relationship with that particular person.
Something I have been praying for is coming to pass. I have been struggling with a particular relationship for several years now. Most people do not know this, as I’ve kept it very close to my heart, and most who think they know me will make comically wrong assumptions.
Regardless of how much I’ve wanted a close relationship with this person, it hasn’t happened over the past few years. If anything, they seemed to wander even farther away from me emotionally. No matter how much I’d envisioned a close and loving relationship, it hasn’t happened. Whenever I made a move to bring us closer, they took two steps away. In short, there was nothing I could do to force the relationship to be what I wanted it to be and what I knew it could be.
In the past two weeks, this has begun to change. The difference hit practically overnight. The other person reached a point in their life where they were ready to make a change in their relationships, a conscious change. Immediately. It was entirely up to them to make this change in mindset and it could not be forced. It had to come from within them. We are now starting to enjoy a new way of relating that’s very special and rewarding to me.
Did I do anything special to bring this special relationship to the forefront, this particular type of relationship with this particular person? Yes.
- I loved them regardless of the distance and regardless of what they’d done.
Thank you for reading!
Would this sort of attitude work in re-attracting a relationship that has gone astray? It seems like you need the will to do this in the long term, something I have though I fear to use it. Congratulations on the way things seem to be going.
Everything Will Be Alright – A Journey Through
Does this work if you have no contact with the person?
I have been practicing this with others, since the time of this original post, and yes, I’ve had others come back into my life after an absence and no contact. I never let the connection be broken or the openness to them be closed. I kept myself open to accept their company when they were at a good place in life to share it with me. It works–just in truly mysterious ways!
Thank you, Lorna! This post of yours gives me so much hope, I read it almost every day 🙂
thanks lorna for the post, i find it really helpful. my question is, should there be action involved?
in my case, me and my boyfriend had a very very intense relationship, up to the point that we both feared of losing each other and thats wht we got, we lost each other; we argued briefly, he misunderstood, and moved on… 2 months ago (we are long distance but we lived together for 7 months before) we met and it was all too powerful i cannot explain…i didnt talk about us, i thought it was too soon after not talking for 7 months, plus he had met someone else straight after we finished (he is long distance with her) I thought we were gonna stay in touch but he ignored my messages after that, maybe he doesnt want to confuse himself by having feelings for me again. i texted him to catch up a couple of times but he never answered..now i am in the process of either letting him go and giving him space without me doing anything, or sending him a letter to tell him how i still feel…i am just afraid it will push him further away, but in the meantime i cant let him go deep down..
i dont know whether you followed the law of action too, or just loved him remotely ( i have been doing visualizing for a very long time now) and it did help cos he re appeared. i just feel guilty i didnt say how i feel when i had him in flesh and bone!
thanks lorna, any advice appreciated
Stella, here’s my answer….http://thespiritualeclectic.wordpress.com/2008/07/08/taking-the-right-action-to-attract-back-someone-special/
I have been waiting for my love (both ways) for years now just to be on the physical plane, getting to know each other. Just like in your case, when I took one step closer, they take two steps back and get into situations and the years going by. I can’t tell you how I know, but I know that the person (in his 60’s and I am in my early 50’s) wants to spend the remaining, precious times of his year in peace and love with me. But he feels he is still in a journey, searching himself (had been through a lot) and here I am feeling all the resistances about ‘time running out’.
Recently I realized that life is to live hear and now. So I have been pondering the idea about dating other people, find a friend to share some love and tenderness with while my love may be spending time elsewhere. If I alllow myself to be with someone else, is it going against my original desire to be with the one I had very powerful connection with? Since everything I’ve done, I couldn’t manifest him in my current reality, I thought I need to live my life too. I haven’t been with anyone for years as it felt like that anyday he would contact me and we will be going out. Over the years many things have happened in his life, some I heard, some I assumed and he is a bit lost soul, but I also feel that he is not sitting alone either. He is the type who needs to have someone around and at this time of his life he is doing the same, spending time with whoever is nearby or convenient. Because in order for him to come to me, he will have to take care of a few things. That’s what I am thinking as I don’t know. But we also know that the Universe has the power to shift things immediately as in your case. That is the minute he decides that he needs to come to me, things will shift?
I would love advice from anyone who may be like me and tell me if it’s okay to think of spending tenderness and joy with another person. Also is it a good idea to be thinking about him (that sure he is coming) while I am with someone else?
Thank you so much.
God bless you.
Mary, I don’t think those connections are ever broken but there is an ebb and flow. There are many things we can learn from others and NEED to learn to make us our best selves. I have had many friends whom I’ve separated from and after some intense work on my part and theirs with other people, we have come back together in a “more whole” sort of way. We could not have learned those things together or from each other but had to love each other enough to give the freedom to let each other learn in the best way, for our highest good. If you want to date or just socialize with others, do it. If not, don’t. But don’t be “waiting” for him or that’s the wrong message to send out. It’s a vibration of always waiting and never having. He will show up when he shows up and his own timing is right and he has learned all he needs to on his own. You, go have fun and learn everything you can. And when the time is right, the Universe will turn on a dime and you’ll both be in a better place to be together, if that’s what you still want.
Thanks so much. I wrote because I saw a great similarity of my story with yours that it took your years to finally see the results with that particular someone. So my question is did you think of him often? Did it ever hurt your feelings that they gave you hints and indirect messages (in my case, it’s a situation that can’t be explained) that you’re the one and they long to be with you. But in reality they are not. Yet, I know for sure that his heart desires me, but there is this lack of power in acting upon his feelings for me.
So what can you advise me in this case? The reason I said that I have been thinking about going out as I haven’t been in the social circles for several years. Wonder if it’s unhealthy not to have physical pleasures although I desire that to be with him. He is the one I love with all my heart and in years the feelings didn’t fade as I thought they would in which case I would’ve found my bliss and complete my absolute solitary (I wanted it all—love, husband, family, all those–never found them) journey on earth. Also there are some unexplainable situations, events that have happened they can only come under ‘spiritual’ umbrella. People will call me ‘nuts’ because they won’t understand. Anytime, I think it’s over; it will never happen, some kind of synchronistic connection appears.
Anyway, what did you do to stay happy and fulfilled yet desired him in your life but not think of him? Thanks so much again for your time.
Mary, I understand the odd synchroncities, etc. Very much. Sometimes the other person has to get to a better place and you can’t get them there yourself. You have to let the Universe/God/Deity/whatever you choose to call it do it for you. Lots of people are afraid to get what they really want because they have deep issues of their own to work through, and I see this in many men who self-sabotage when they get close to their dreams. This is a public forum so I won’t go into details of my own relationships and what’s happened to bring people back into my life currently, but the best thing you can do is to focus on YOU. You have to find what you like and get to a place where you can be happy with or without him, honestly to the point of where it doesn’t matter if he returns or not. That’s the part that YOU have to work on in his absence and leave him to work on his own stuff.He can’t do yours for you and you can’t do his for him. You each have to be responsible for your own healing and your own joy. And btw, I never stopped thinking of anyone who’s come back to me. They have always been in my heart, and I’ve left it open to them to return.
And when I thought all was lost… and when I thought there was nothing I could do.. thank you!
I am so grateful to have found your blog and this entry (along with the related ones). My story is very similar to Mary’s (8-2-08) except that he is choosing to stay on the edge of my life sending jokes a couple of times a week but not really communicating otherwise. I have a reasonable understanding of the law of attraction as well as the teachings of Abraham and wondered if there were specific affirmations or visualizations that you did to bring your guy back into your life?
Also, would it be possible to do coaching by email on this specific issue so that it could be discussed more indepth?
Hi, — Contact me through my site at LornaTedder.com for my rates. I do email coaching for various needs, so let me know more about what you have in mind and we can work it out.
I met someone and we have been seeing each other for about 6 weeks now and all has been going really well, so i thought, he has been talking about moving back to Texas, and we were doing really well but one day after he left i tried to call him the next day and text him and he did not reply or return my calls. at this point i would think forget it but that is just not like him, he always called right back. any advice i dont want to call him as i have already called twice and texted i dont want to seem like i am pushy