I Need You in My House (Cuz You’re My Home)

Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree of Truth.

It’s odd how houses show up in my meditations  and dreams.  I’ve been in other people’s  “houses”  — metaphysical  structures  that represented  how  they  present themselves to the outside world and what goes on deep inside.

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I’ve been  in my  ex’s  mansion,  in The  Treat’s  busy home office with the cottage on the water in back, in the house  I  grew   up  in—maybe   that’s   my metaphysical house? In general, these are houses that don’t really exist except to represent the inner dimensions  of  the person who visits me in my dreams and meditations.

I can’t recall any other metaphysical houses in particular except for  a  house belonging  to a former friend of mine…one that creeped me out with its haunted spiraling staircases  and  the  dank,  open-windowed,  hidden basement  rooms  where  she  hides  her  darkest  secrets.  I’ve been in that one once, with her dragging me inside. Definitely a nightmare.

But sometimes  the  houses  aren’t  the  metaphysical sort. They’re like real structures, physical structures, even though I haven’t been there yet.

There’s one house in particular that shows up in many of my dreams. I’ve been to celebrations there where I was an honored guest and the local community knew me and I knew them and I was there with my girls and with my new…husband? Partner.  We’ll  keep it at that. The girls were older  and independent.  They  usually  are in these kinds of dreams.

But that’s the house from side and back. I’ve seen it from  the  front,  at  night,  as  my  family  drove  up  and walked inside. I was driving, the girls were with me, my partner  beside  me.  I  may  have  been  pregnant  in  that dream. Either that or the sense of new beginnings. (I’m more inclined to think it was new beginnings, given the unlikelihood of my bearing any more children.)

And I’ve seen it in the late afternoon, early evening. Lots of glass  windows overlooking  patios and gardens, and a lake or…water  that comes right up to the grass of the lawn.  Flowers  blooming.  Candlelight  on  the  patio. The girls in the house somewhere. My partner sitting with me on the patio as we watch the sunset and talk lovingly about projects  we’re working  on  together  and  share  a genuine sense of companionship and home.

I like this house I keep seeing. I hope it’s real.

Because for  everyone  in  this  house  and  around  it, there’s a wonderful sense of coming home.

I’ve been  in my  ex’s  mansion,  in The  Treat’s  busy home office with the cottage on the water in back, in the house  I  grew   up  in—maybe   that’s   my metaphysical house? In general, these are houses that don’t really exist except to represent the inner dimensions  of  the person who visits me in my dreams and meditations.

I can’t recall any other metaphysical houses in particular except for  a  house belonging  to a former friend of mine…one that creeped me out with its haunted spiraling staircases  and  the  dank,  open-windowed,  hidden basement  rooms  where  she  hides  her  darkest  secrets.  I’ve been in that one once, with her dragging me inside. Definitely a nightmare.

But sometimes  the  houses  aren’t  the  metaphysical sort. They’re like real structures, physical structures, even though I haven’t been there yet.

There’s one house in particular that shows up in many of my dreams. I’ve been to celebrations there where I was an honored guest and the local community knew me and I knew them and I was there with my girls and with my new…husband? Partner.  We’ll  keep it at that. The girls were older  and independent.  They  usually  are in these kinds of dreams.

But that’s the house from side and back. I’ve seen it from  the  front,  at  night,  as  my  family  drove  up  and walked inside. I was driving, the girls were with me, my partner  beside  me.  I  may  have  been  pregnant  in  that dream. Either that or the sense of new beginnings. (I’m more inclined to think it was new beginnings, given the unlikelihood of my bearing any more children.)

And I’ve seen it in the late afternoon, early evening. Lots of glass  windows overlooking  patios and gardens, and a lake or…water  that comes right up to the grass of the lawn.  Flowers  blooming.  Candlelight  on  the  patio. The girls in the house somewhere. My partner sitting with me on the patio as we watch the sunset and talk lovingly about projects  we’re working  on  together  and  share  a genuine sense of companionship and home.

I like this house I keep seeing. I hope it’s real.

Because for  everyone  in  this  house  and  around  it, there’s a wonderful sense of coming home.


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