I don’t know if it’s getting older or if I’m just getting tireder or if I’m just done with being nice and cooperative, but I’ve lost all patience with some people. I’ve started calling it out on a regular basis, and letting the chips fall where they may, which I know some people find alarming or think it’s not “me.” I assure you it’s me–they’ve just always seen me overlook their bad behavior or plowing through my boundaries in an effort to get things done, to keep the peace, or to not put my employer in a bad situation. I’m not sure if that makes me “grumpy” or “Crotchety” or what, but the people who think I’m either have no idea how much this side of me has been a long time coming.
One of the behaviors I’m calling out now is the One-Note Fan on social media. You’ll recognize what I mean.
The First Mosquito
A few years ago, around the time Covid was killing off my friends, my dementia-struck mom was in a facility hours away, and I dared not step outside unmasked because of my own underlying conditions, I had a Facebook contact who followed everything I posted, but never commented on anything except one specific subject. She was well-known in the indie publishing world and I’d bought her services on several occasions.
Guide to Petty Revenge — because sometimes satisfaction comes in small, deliberate packages. Get it direct from the author →
She was also well-known for sharing partial screenshots of private conversations and suing anyone who disagreed with her or questioned her claims. She had a large following–people who do this always do–and if anyone unfriended or blocked her or left her a bad review, she mobilized her army against them. So when I saw some things I didn’t like, I didn’t immediately block her because I didn’t want to deal with that BS while my mom was dying. I unfollowed her posts, but I’d seen her have a little tantrum when someone unfriended or blocked her, so I hid her.
Which worked. For a while.
Then, of the gazillion subjects I post about on social media, she started commenting on my posts. But only on the ones where I talked about my anxiety over whether a vaccine would be available in time for me to see my mom again in-person and her still remember me. Then this person would pop in to tell me how stupid I was for even considering a vaccine and enumerate all the reasons I was stupid for not following her “research.”
Not everyone understands me, and that’s okay. No one who really knows me has ever called me a sheep. Most don’t call me unintelligent either.
I ignored her for a while longer. Not because I was already emotionally exhausted but because if I pushed back at all, I risked her turning her followers against me to cause me further grief. The one time I responded even neutrally to her comments, I was featured in one of her sheeple posts. It took a while to quietly get off her radar, and I can happily say we’re no longer “friends” on social media and she’s blocked from seeing my content. Sure, she has other ways of finding it, but it takes a few more steps on her part.
The Second Mosquito
This year, since DOGE moved in and fired or pushed out many of the dedicated public servants I used to work with and I’ve watched my life’s work be destroyed and my audience reduced by 95%, I’ve had another contact on a social media platform where I publish content about Federal acquisition and the Federal workforce almost exclusively. For all the free content I provide to help others, this person–not the one previously mentioned–never comments on anything I post.
Except certain subjects. Like anytime I express frustration with DOGE for firing good people prematurely and then whining about not having good people. Or when I’ve openly helped displaced brilliant people I trained to find a different job when they really loved public service and what they were doing for their country.
Not a word, not a like, nothing on any other subject, but always there to push their own agenda while ignoring what others are going through.
Removing the Mosquito from the Room
I hit my limit today. If I have one less follower because of it, I’m okay with that.
Not all engagement on social media is worthwhile. If a mosquito keeps buzzing in my ear when I’m trying to work, I’m going to remove one of us from the room.
Justice doesn’t always wear a cape. Sometimes it arrives quietly.
Visit the Book Page →