Defining the Path
Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree and Rising.
Another milestone day! Tonight I graduate from the first phase of the certification program Iâ€™m working on for my career transition. Itâ€™s expensive but worth every penny to make some dreams come true. It may be a couple of years before I see the payoff, but itâ€™s a huge step in the right direction, a new path for me.
Iâ€™d thought when I began this program last July that Iâ€™d be done by January. That was the plan. Graduate early. And this is so ME. Not that I wanted to graduate early for the sake of graduating early, but I had plans for the future and they needed to be well in place by January. Which meant launching my new career part-time back in the October/November time frame but instead, Iâ€™m a good six months behind where I thought Iâ€™d beâ€¦and graduating exactly on time for what the program calls for. I know, I know. Iâ€™m impatient.
So life got in the way of my life plans. Too many tragedies, some heart-warming new experiences. In any case, I now have the tools I need and then some. The lessons Iâ€™ve learned since January have been invaluable and they might not have been available if Iâ€™d finished the program then.
Last year was all about expanding and trying all sorts of things. This year is about focusing, pulling back in, defining the tools I need and the desires I have.
For the past few years, itâ€™s been important to me to be undefined. I didnâ€™t want a normal relationship by anyoneâ€™s definition, and thatâ€™s what I gotâ€”undefined. The lack of restriction was incredibly important to me to grow as a person, especially as an independent person who can now talk about things other than anything that occurred during my lifetime with my ex. Iâ€™m proud to have built a separate and full life and be able to carry on conversations that have a firm basis not in my former marriage and life then but in my own separate life of abundance, in the here and now, and with a great nod to the future.
But now Iâ€™m seeking to take all the chaos of creation and lack of definition from the past few years and put them into some type of structure. For certain, itâ€™s not any structure that most people consider normal, but itâ€™s better defined for me. This is where I keep seeing that Star Gate image: the gateway to the future with each notch clicking into place as the wheel turns and opportunities to step through if I choose to.
So all of my relationships are becoming better defined in the sense of structure. That includes friendships, personal relationships, business partnerships, my place in the world. Iâ€™ve been wandering but not lost for quite a while now. I know where Iâ€™m going now. I have a map that shows where I am and the different pathsâ€”though not all of themâ€”to where I want to be.
Then again, when itâ€™s time to define a new path by walking it, Iâ€™m just as likely to sprint out across both flowers and thorns and pave a new way. In fact, I kinda like being the first one to walk a well-worn path.