New Moon Assessment: What’s Working
Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree and Rising.
Every now and then, it’s time for an assessment. Not of what’s wrong but of what’s working. I try to do these at the new moon, but no more than that.
So what’s working for me that I plan to continue to allow to work for me?
– Enjoying the lovely little things. A walk under the stars. The so-bright crescent moon under a superbright Venus and lining up with Antares and the Hyades. The scent of honeysuckle growing over the trellises I built in the side yard. Repairing the lawn mower before realizing I need yet another part to keep it running. Seeing Aislinn’s grin over the 600 photos she took of My Chemical Romance at their concert last night. Discussing ancient Latin P0rn0graphia with Shannon.
– Letting things happen in their own time. Some projects seem to meet a lot of opposition just bringing them to fruition, but they’re there at the right time for the person who needs to read them. They’re also a product of the moment in time when they were being written and would never be the same at any other point in time just as any child born is a product of a specific moment in their parents’ lives and no other. This doesn’t mean I don’t take action—just that I don’t beat myself up as much if it doesn’t happen at the exact moment that I think/want/hope it will.
– Letting the world come to me. Obi-Wan mentioned something interesting a few weeks ago. She said that I’m like the Hierophant of the Tarot now, the spiritual teacher who holds keys. The difference is, I used to take the keys to others and now I’m holding the keys and letting people come to me. It’s really different. Instead of going after the things I want, I am letting them come to me. If what I have to offer is important enough, they will make the effort to seek me out.
– Allowing loving energies to connect with me and filtering out the murky or ill-intended ones before they reach me. I’m not getting so sidetracked in other peoples’ pain right now and so I’m less distracted from feeling really good about things in my own life and I’m not letting someone else’s drama or negativity leave me overly stressed. This is still a struggle but the improvement is vast. I am learning to distance myself from bearing the burden for others and merging with pain but at the same time I keep my sense of compassion.
– Observing rather than fixing. Oh, it’s still hard. I want to dive in and help. But I’ve learned that it’s usually either not wanted, not even recognized as help, or not the wonderful thing I’d want it to be. Sometimes people have to struggle, like the bird pipping or dying if it’s too easy because you pull the shell off to set him free before he’s mature enough to make it in the world that’s open to him. The struggle makes some people stronger and they must have the strength and clarity to meet their potential.
– Lighting candles regularly for unconditional love. I do this for several people, just to help light their way and keep them in my heart. I don’t think any of them know. It’s a hard thing to say, no matter what, I love you anyway. And at the same time, it’s also becoming such a part of me that I don’t even think of it as hard or easy because it’s just part of who I am now. I was never able to do it for my dad because I had too many issues to work through and too many deep wounds back to my tiny years, but I’m at a better place with even that now, too.
– Surfing. That’s what I used to call it when I would ride the waves of my emotions and life’s dramas, not making hard and fast decisions when I was on top or on bottom. Every now and then, I have to let a wave of loss wash over me, but I’m still upright and moving forward.
– Letting go of the past, trusting in myself, and having faith in the future. And being open to wonderful surprises.