Irresistible Forces: PUH—UUUUUUUSHHHHHH!
Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree of Contrast.
My organization has a buzzword that’s overused: pushback. As in, “I got a lot of pushback from that scummy contractor when I questioned his accounting procedures.” Meaning, “resistance.”
I work very hard to make things happen rather than sitting by idly and expecting others to take care of me. But as I’ve been told before, I sometimes work so hard to bring it to me and then push it away when it arrives. I’m determined not to keep doing that.
One of the 17 things I’d called for to manifest in December was lots of book sales and ways to make lots more happen. Almost everything I’d called for in December has happened but this is one where there’s been some pushback, or resistance, to fulfillment…and I’m the cause of it. I brought it to me, then shoved it away.
The morning of the day that Daddy died, I started getting calls from reporters and reviewers for interviews. Not good timing, I told myself. I need to update all my websites, I need to launch the new website, and then immediately followed by the news about Daddy and my needing to take care of family and emotional business. So I pushed the interviews aside for a while. They would have spurred book sales in December but the timing was bad, bad, bad for me personally.
The morning after Daddy died, I started getting calls from distributors and library wholesalers who wanted to carry my books, with a couple of Spilled Candy books for kids getting a lot of focus. Unfortunately, I didn’t have everything I needed with me in Georgia and wasn’t in the right frame of mind for business and the timing was bad, so I put them off.
Back in November, when Daddy was in the hospital, I got caught up in family stuff and didn’t realize my membership in an organization of 10,000 writers had just lapsed, and I had a suspense novel (“Dark Revelations”) that I wanted to submit to them for a prestigious competition because I think it has a really good shot. When I realized I had about 2 days left to rectify the situation and that I had not missed the deadline, I took it as a sign of one of the good things I’d called in back in November and finished the paperwork just in the knick of time. Then Daddy died and I didn’t get the books in the mail for the competition. Actually, I forgot all about it. Yesterday morning, I got a reminder notice from the award coordinator and quickly messaged Shannon to have her package and send the books so they’d arrive in time without having to be overnighted. The message didn’t get through. My first instinct when I learned this was, “Oh, well. There’s no way the books will make it on time. I might as well forget about the award.”
So all the things I’d been doing to attract that particular good thing into my life were laid at my feet and I nearly walked away from them all because of lousy timing.
I feel like the Incredible Hulk ripping off my shirt and stomping forward (just not so green or bicep-y). It’s a big puh-uuuuuush!
I’ve rescheduled my interviews and reviews for January, returned the distributors and wholesalers’ calls and set up those accounts, and I overnighted the books to the award coordinator to make sure they get there by the deadline, with time to spare. The thing is, once I pushed hard, it suddenly got easy again, as if everything shifted and the momentum started up again.
I guess I just had to clear the goo that was piling up around my feet so I could start moving forward again. Or at least stepping over the immovable objects.