Picky and All the Better for It

Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree of Truth.

I’ve been called picky quite a bit in the past few years, mostly in regard to date-able men and my interpretation of  the  term  date-able, but  I’ve  been  picky  also  when  it comes to the commitment  of taking on students. Which is why I don’t have a boyfriend or a student right now.

Life Coaching TipsMy Sunday Night Gatherings and spiritual road-trips have been the most beneficial  over the past two years. For the moment, it seems to work better for me to work with others—sharing, learning, and teaching—rather than concentrating  mostly on teaching. I  like the idea of students but in choosing my students, I’m also choosing my next teachers. And even though I didn’t commit to any of these students, they taught me plenty.

The students  were downright  scary. I didn’t hang a shingle. They all sought me out, even before my last elevation.

The one thing they all had in common was that they wanted me to teach them and pass power to them and make  them  into  High Priests  and Priestesses,  but they wanted to call the shots. And they didn’t want to do the work.  And  becoming  a  High  Priest  or  Priestess  is  all about doing the work.

Potential student #1 informed  me that she knew via her psychic gift that I was to teach her and that I’d be the one to conduct her  Initiation  and she’d be my first student. However, meeting at my house for a Sunday Night Gathering once a week or even every other week was too much for her busy schedule.  Huh?  I was working  100 hours  a  week  between  my  day  job  and  my  writing/ publishing career and she occasionally did PTA meetings? But she  explained  that  I really  needed to  change  it to once a month and any more than that was impossible for her schedule. And did she really have to do the exercise

to come up with a magickal name? Maybe if I could give her enough good reasons, she’d consider it. And could I do a ritual for something for her when we did meet? And did I think it would really take several years for her to get her Third Degree? (Topping from the bottom has applications to spiritual circles as well, I suppose.)

Potential student #2 was timid and eager to learn but

needed her atheist husband’s permission for me to teach her. Could I just meet her on my lunch hour a couple of times a week instead? (I didn’t pass her husband’s inspection, by the way, even dressed in a suit. The pope wouldn’t have passed inspection  either, if the pope had been teaching anything other than atheism.)

Potential student #3 wanted to be my equal in everything even though she was new to Wicca. Perhaps I could call her High  Priestess and just forgo the training since she was already so skilled at clairvoyance? (obviously not skilled enough)

Potential student #4 wanted to learn because learning is,  um,  important,   especially   if  you  think  your  High Priestess is rich  because she has a Government job and might lend you some money and not really expect you to pay it back because she doesn’t take money for teaching and  she’s  nice  and  gee,  it’s  nice  to  have  friends  with money  and besides, a High Priestess can be responsible for you and give you  lots  of attention…. (I already have two children.)

Potential  student   #5,  while  in  a  circle  I’d  cast, abruptly invoked a Death Goddess to take care of a co- worker she hated! I  never  agreed to teach her but I did start her off on some nice literature  and meditations  to help bring out the Goddess in her and soften her.  She didn’t have time to read anything, she told me.  Couldn’t I just tell her my secrets and be done with it?  Like money spells?      And love spells?   And  how to get revenge?  (It didn’t help that she tried to manipulate me every chance

she got to make me think she had dibs on The Treat and could deliver  him to me if I’d just teach her what she wanted to know.)

Potential student #6 was very sweet but only wanted to be my student because his girlfriend was in my Sunday Night circle. Once they married and he could see her any- time, he lost interest. (And so did she.)

Potential student #7 called out of the blue—on my daytime minutes, thanks to Student #1 giving her my private number—wanting me to teach her and demanding I Initiate her ASAP because she was  “ready.” I suggested we get to know each other better so we could see if we were a good fit and after several months, we’d see if she and I were interested in a student/teacher  relationship.  I suggested  she  come  to  a  couple  of  my  Sunday  Night Gatherings because we were doing some incredible work together with unified  field theory,  crystal  healings,  and chakras.  She  dismissed  my  suggestion,  saying  that  she could go to gatherings anytime, anywhere, and she probably already knew all that  stuff I might teach there. No, she wanted to be Initiated now. And she needed to make sure I would never allow men into my group (already un- true) because she wanted to be in a woman-only  circle. She needed to know at the end of that hour-long phone conversation if I’d Initiate her or not…or she might have to find someone else. Why couldn’t I give her answer on the spot? (I did.)

The list  goes  on  of  potential  students  who’ve  approached  me  over  the  past  3  years.  None  have  felt “right.” In some cases, there was nothing  “wrong”  with the student but it just didn’t feel right and I followed my intuition. Some dropped out a few months after convincing someone else to take them in. Others hit the equivalent of Second  Degree  Hell and are still there.  Others have bounced  around among  several  different  religions and continue to bounce.

By last December, I got the feeling that I won’t have a circle in this location. Maybe wherever I live next. These were all tests, so I’d know who not to teach and not to feel compelled  to take on a student  I  wasn’t  meant  to teach just to be nice (the curse of a Southern woman). That’s okay. I’ll wait.