Faith in the Future You Cannot See
Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree Tilt.
While in Daytona, Â I meet up with a High Priestess friend I havenâ€™t seen in ages. We have a long-standing tradition of reading cards for each other whenever we do get together in the physical realm, even though Iâ€™ve never considered myself any good at it and sheâ€™s quite the ex- pert, especially Â with Â Kabbalah-based Â cards. Â But Â itâ€™s Â yet another eye opener in a week full of epiphanies, Â and itâ€™s only Friday.
She â€œlays cardsâ€ for me, three times, for three situations I want to look at and mull over. Iâ€™m fascinated Â by the choice of spreads she uses. Her style reminds me of AngelSuâ€™s Â and Â her Â intuition Â yields very similar Â results about some situations she knows virtually nothing about except from my question.
The main thing Iâ€™m confused about is the disconnectÂ between what a private,Â online writersâ€™ group has been discussing Â concerning Â the publishing industry and especially the future of paranormal fiction. Theyâ€™ve been com- paring royalty statements with increasing ardor for nearly a year, and theyâ€™ve seen some upsets with their publishers, one in particular. They are angry, hopeless, and with- holding, no longer sending material to their publishers, rebelling and Â instead Â taking Â jobs at McDonaldâ€™s Â but at least feeling in control somehow of their futures.
And yet, here at this conference Â in Daytona, Iâ€™m not seeing anything to support their declarations. Â Iâ€™ve turned my back on paranormal fiction because of so much Iâ€™ve heard from them, and yet Â here, itâ€™s all vampires, Â were- wolves, witches, and demons. Not just selling but selling well. Itâ€™s the â€œnext big thing.â€
So my question is about which of so many sudden opportunities to follow. Itâ€™s like a hallway with many doors, all of them opening at once.
â€œThereâ€™s a man coming into your future,â€Â the High Priestess Â says. Even Â though Â the Â question Â is specifically about me, about my future and what area of work Iâ€™m to focus on. Itâ€™s not about a manâ€”surprise!
â€œOr maybe Â heâ€™sÂ coming Â back into yourÂ future,â€ Â she continues. â€œThereâ€™s a past connection to him. Youâ€™ve met him before. Not a husband or boyfriend, though. Youâ€™re going to run into him again, and itâ€™s a Â relationship that will open up in the future for you.â€
She goes on to describe this man…the color of his hair and eyes, his physique, his good looks, his approximate age. Well, hey, Â thank the Gods. Heâ€™s sexy and fabulous. Too bad she doesnâ€™t draw because Iâ€™d love to see a picture of the guy she describes…kind Â of a Â wanted poster, maybe? â€œThere is a great discord with him now. His focus is Â too much on his work and heâ€™s put aside his creative outlets in favor of toil and building his financial fortune.â€
â€œItâ€™s not about the money itself. Itâ€™s about security.Â His motherâ€™s given him a great gift and a great curse,â€ she says. â€œBecause Â of her, he plans everything. Every detail. He has to. He has to have a Â blueprint for the future to make sure heâ€™s builtÂ the right Â foundation.â€ Â She pauses and looks into my eyes. â€œHe has no faith in a future he cannot see, so he must plan it carefully to make it happen.â€
I realize Â Iâ€™ve had no faith in a futureÂ whereÂ all my dreams come true and I spend my life doing the work I yearn to do, all of it and all kinds of it, rather than having to choose which small part of my activities Â will put the roof over my head. I can see it in the distance, often like a mirage, but I donâ€™t know how to get from here to there.
The next cards show me a Princess of Wands, a 10 of Wands, a 7 of Cups, more.
â€œItâ€™s already Â manifesting,â€ Â she Â tells Â me. Â â€œYou Â have your dream of the life you want. Itâ€™s very clearly in your mind. You Â just Â have Â to take Â a Â few Â steps Â to bring Â the manifestation Â from Â the Â mental Â and spiritual Â into Â the physical.â€
The next step shows me building a â€œbody of work,â€ taking the blueprints Iâ€™ve already made and building creations and a life I will utterly adore. Plain and simple, itâ€™s hard work and planning and not sitting idly by.
That doesnâ€™t Â mean Â my dreams Â will come Â true Â over night, but sometimes Â the Â best Â way Â to Â make Â magick Â is through hard work and persistence, even when all youâ€™ve done to date has been hard work and persistence.
This is obviously no time to stop. Iâ€™ll rest when I get there.