Ask an Empath: Leaving a Bad Relationship

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Question:  Why is it so hard for an empath to break up with someone or to leave a bad relationship?

An empath will become immersed in his or her mate’s feelings. If the mate is overly critical of the empath or feels that the empath has been guilty of wrongdoing, then the empath is likely to pick up on that and feel that the criticisms and deficiencies are justified.

This is especially dangerous when the empath is in a relationship with a narcissist.

Even in a bad relationship, the empath will take on the emotions of the mate. So, if the mate feels put upon or superior or right, then the empath may confuse those feelings with his or her own feelings, merging emotions. For an empath to merge emotions with a mate, this means that the empath may easily see the mate’s feelings as justified, whatever those feelings are.

The secret to figuring out which feelings are the empath’s and which are the mate’s is to take some time away from each other. Narcissists and control freaks will do everything in their power to keep the empath from having time away. Time away provides objectivity–being out of the energy of someone else so that the empath can recall and strengthen their own feelings about themselves, as well as about the other person and their relationship.

 

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