Why the Tulip
Copyrighted by Lorna Tedder. Originally published in Third Degree of Truth.
Iâ€™ve been asked why the girl in the previous post has a tulip. This has been describedÂ to me in detail by my ex- mom-in-law, but Iâ€™ll be brief. Itâ€™s not so strange that this child would show up in this meditation, Â yet Â she was as much as surpriseÂ as the woman of vines and tentacles, basically because theyâ€™re the same person.
When my ex-mom-in-law Â was Â 5 years Â old, she was very sick and died. Her twin brother came to her bedside with a tulip to show her and he called to her but she was already gone. Because Â he Â called Â to her, she came back, following his voice. She eventually recovered, lying in her bed and gazing at the tulip in the window.
There is a special Â innocence Â to this story, Â beautiful between her and her brother. Itâ€™s something she tried to talk the rest of the family about but they refused to talk about it. I was the only one in her family Â or circleÂ of friends that she could talk to about her near death experience.
This sweet little girl grew up into an extremely con- trolling woman, sister, wife, and motherâ€”she Â has 5 kids and they are all as emotionally isolated as my ex. Because of antics toward my daughters this Â past summer, I now understand Â what Â life was Â likeÂ for my ex when Â he Â was growing up and why he is such an emotional Â distancer who will not let anyone in and will not share himself with anyone. She is inordinately Â attached to her brother and does everything she can to control his Â lifeâ€”and is very upset to keep running up against her sis-in-law who is extremely dominant and wonâ€™t put up with this womanâ€™s antics, when she knows about them.
Sheâ€™s put some bad stuff out there over the years and her karma is Â returning in this lifetime. Right now, sheâ€™s intent on separating me from my daughters to punish me for leaving the family. Iâ€™m not going to let that happen. She has refused to let go of me over the past 2 years. Even Â recently Â in Â meditations, Â she Â just Â keeps Â grabbing hold. Iâ€™ve tried Â to break the ties in a peaceful way. Her health is fair to good and sheâ€™s determined Â to fix things for her son before she dies, so sheâ€™s intensified Â her efforts.
Somewhere underneath all this anger and fear of hers is still Â that Â little Â girl Â with Â the Â tulip. Â I think Â maybe Â the monster has to â€œdieâ€ before the innocence can re-emerge.